You know it didn’t happen, but you are being implicated for something that u didn’t do. You explaining it to them but the person in front of you are not bothered to believe you a cent.
Well it is very hurting when you’re telling the truth and people just don’t believe you. You try your best to explain in all the way that you know they have to believe it yet they still stare at you with a ‘no way’ look. Which means no matter how u squeeze it, scream or roll around it not gonna work. They dun regard your innocent words or even your expressive cries.
U feel wanna break everything in front you and yell out, ‘u dumb people why dun u understand? What language you want me to speak to convince?’ You cry loudly inside your heart yet quietly sit on the corner. U struggle, suffer and feel so shame and angry for not be trusted.
I still remember a day of my childhood.. I was standard 3, studying in a 3rd language school; I’m not good or fluent in that language yet. It was a spelling session. I’m not competent in that subject. Without knowing what gonna write I sit quietly to start the spelling. Just after the last question read by my teacher, we’re about to pass up the books. Suddenly my friend called our group monitor and complains that I kept book inside my drawer and cheated in spelling. My group monitor came to my place get that book and accuse me cheating. I explain to her that I didn’t. She didn’t believe me. I whom can’t converse well tried my best to make her convince but she’s firm in her charge on me. That moment, still clearly playing in my mental picture. I was helplessly keep repeating ‘Really, I didn’t copy; it is REAL’. That day for me REALLY was equal to PROMISE. But poor me, I can’t express more than that, but I strain and squashed to make her believe me.
However she went straight to my teacher and report that I cheated. It was that easy. Teacher asked me come in front the classroom and punished me. I got spanked and had to pulling the ears, squat up and down for 100 times. I did miserably, obeying my teacher’s order. That moment my inner state of feelings was like volcano. I hid them deep inside my heart and finished it off. It’s not about the punishment but the trust that nobody gave me when I needed it. The feeling of shame that I carry that moment was heavier than anything in the world. I disappointed, broke and back to my sit. I didn’t talk to anyone. I couldn’t take it that they lay blame on me for something that not true. Well I may not a smart child but I was honest. I will never cheat in exam in any case and I was such till I completed my college.
That day I got hurt very much. Very much as a deep wound that still ache when I am thinking about it. I hated the moment, I hated them, I hated everything. I was weak that day and I guess that changed me a lot to a less confidence child but surprisingly to an aggressive kid later in my secondary school days. Whenever teachers blame me for something I didn’t do, I tend to provoke and fight back! Yes, the sad thing is its not the only time it happens to me but many time in my life.. They just assume, assume and assume things. What’s wrong if try to listen to the explanation and at least look for proof or whatever to avoid someone simply got blamed. I hate autocratic. Just because they are elder than us don’t mean they can charge us blindly. Even for a tiny matter it is not acceptable. I promised to myself I will never do this to another child. In my life there is no chance for error in this matter. The saying "Better that ten guilty persons escape than that one innocent suffer" not only for law but even in school.It could change one's life! Do not make the mistake..
Well it is very hurting when you’re telling the truth and people just don’t believe you. You try your best to explain in all the way that you know they have to believe it yet they still stare at you with a ‘no way’ look. Which means no matter how u squeeze it, scream or roll around it not gonna work. They dun regard your innocent words or even your expressive cries.
U feel wanna break everything in front you and yell out, ‘u dumb people why dun u understand? What language you want me to speak to convince?’ You cry loudly inside your heart yet quietly sit on the corner. U struggle, suffer and feel so shame and angry for not be trusted.
I still remember a day of my childhood.. I was standard 3, studying in a 3rd language school; I’m not good or fluent in that language yet. It was a spelling session. I’m not competent in that subject. Without knowing what gonna write I sit quietly to start the spelling. Just after the last question read by my teacher, we’re about to pass up the books. Suddenly my friend called our group monitor and complains that I kept book inside my drawer and cheated in spelling. My group monitor came to my place get that book and accuse me cheating. I explain to her that I didn’t. She didn’t believe me. I whom can’t converse well tried my best to make her convince but she’s firm in her charge on me. That moment, still clearly playing in my mental picture. I was helplessly keep repeating ‘Really, I didn’t copy; it is REAL’. That day for me REALLY was equal to PROMISE. But poor me, I can’t express more than that, but I strain and squashed to make her believe me.
However she went straight to my teacher and report that I cheated. It was that easy. Teacher asked me come in front the classroom and punished me. I got spanked and had to pulling the ears, squat up and down for 100 times. I did miserably, obeying my teacher’s order. That moment my inner state of feelings was like volcano. I hid them deep inside my heart and finished it off. It’s not about the punishment but the trust that nobody gave me when I needed it. The feeling of shame that I carry that moment was heavier than anything in the world. I disappointed, broke and back to my sit. I didn’t talk to anyone. I couldn’t take it that they lay blame on me for something that not true. Well I may not a smart child but I was honest. I will never cheat in exam in any case and I was such till I completed my college.
That day I got hurt very much. Very much as a deep wound that still ache when I am thinking about it. I hated the moment, I hated them, I hated everything. I was weak that day and I guess that changed me a lot to a less confidence child but surprisingly to an aggressive kid later in my secondary school days. Whenever teachers blame me for something I didn’t do, I tend to provoke and fight back! Yes, the sad thing is its not the only time it happens to me but many time in my life.. They just assume, assume and assume things. What’s wrong if try to listen to the explanation and at least look for proof or whatever to avoid someone simply got blamed. I hate autocratic. Just because they are elder than us don’t mean they can charge us blindly. Even for a tiny matter it is not acceptable. I promised to myself I will never do this to another child. In my life there is no chance for error in this matter. The saying "Better that ten guilty persons escape than that one innocent suffer" not only for law but even in school.It could change one's life! Do not make the mistake..
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