Birthday

Technically that’s the day you born. It’s the day reminds u that u are another year older. It’s a day that people reach u overwhelmingly to wish. It’s a day for you to see how many friends u have in a way. (Yet no messages don’t mean they are count anyway). It is a day u try to pass with good thoughts, mood and action. A day that later you realize not really special actually but just another ordinary day. Yet people try to make it special in many ways. you don’t feel exciting cutting cake or throw a party by any means but u forced to do so by nice people around u.
The day almost comes to the end, you think about it and you feel funny why it become not special for u anymore. Time was you had expectation to be noticed, you’re ignored. Now when you don’t have any expectation people notice you very much. Nobody’s fault, that’s life. Whatever it is, let it be. Just stay cool, nothing to feel special anyhow. Affirming it’s just another ordinary, unremarkable day :-)

Mother

You are god’s gift for species of human. You are diamond that always shine and never lost it value. No other love could more sincere than a mother’s. Mum, you gave me life; gave me endless and love. You tenderness and pure care always touches my heart. I still remember those days u put me on your lap. Those days I sleep beside you with hugs and my leg covers you. Those days I lean on your chest for comfort. Those days you groom us, after shower. Those days we play outdoor, then run to you and you feed us with love as well. Those days you kissed me whenever I won a competition. Those days we stay close to you bodily. Mum I wish those moments remain or returns. Mum, I miss you so much. Thou I’m with you, still close to you spiritually but I still yearning for those moments when I was a child under your direct squashy roof. I wish I never missed or build bridge between us which change our manner to each other. Less mushy, hardly any hugs and almost zero kisses. Why I grew up? Why there is a gap between parents and grown up child? Teenagers’ times are phase of chaos in almost everybody’s life. Changes are dramatics and rule the era. There is when the parenting mode changed as well. Many times parents and child both start to keep space between them as shy merely. Or in some cases, the impact of conflict between them. Apparently, time goes on and things totally changed when they move to age of youth and adult. Thou some may triumph over the conflict and boost the momentum but the bodily touch lost forever. I think a child is always a child to the parents even the son grown up to be a father himself; goes the same for a daughter. No matter what take place, they are still remaining as children. And as long as they do, the touch of love should remains. A mother’s touch is healing therapy for any pain. Mum, I wish I can back to those moments. But conform to the irreversible cycle of life. I have to make as wise wish.. I wish to born as your child again to gain the precious love. Wait a second, enough being a selfish child, I change my mind. I hope to have u as my child in next birth so that I will give you the tremendous care and love in return. Else there is no way to repay the 'debt!' May my wish come true. God bless you, mum.

S = Sweet look with heartfelt smile

E = Endless care through unbeatable and painful scarification

L = Love us deeply

L = Love us simply

A = And thinking about us, us and us every second!

M = Mother’s affection is just beyond compare …

A = Amma, one life is not enough to pay you back!
H = Happy Mother’s Day and thank you for everything…

Mothers day 2009

Another year with its pink and heart shape decoration season everywhere.. Mother’s day has its grand publicity compare to 10 years ago … My mum is 56 yrs old this year.. I’m thinking what to present her for mother’s day.. Thinking about bringing her for body massage with foot relaxation.  She not gonna say yes in first place but I must bring her J yeah that’s her… as most of mother she is very self-scarifying and fully children-orientated. She hardly asks us anything for herself. Anything we offered will not accept by her easily as well. She went thru so many difficulties in life for us. She never enjoys any luxury stuff in her life… I want her to feel all this things .. another one I’m planning is a comfort chair for her, guess she’ll like it. But I aware all these gift could only make her surprise and happy for a minute, the next minute what matter is our love for her. Love your endlessly and make her real happy by being with her.. talk to her and spend valuable time with her while she is healthy.

Many of us busy making our account fat. Or some may really financially down and in situation to work day n might to keep going. While searching for it, we may take granted our time with family. Do not. 

Shoot for the moon!

Shoot for the moon... even if you miss, you'll land among the stars.

Friendship vs Lifeship

Once upon a time, when we are still under age of 10s, we’d friend with anyone despite their difference. We play, play and play without worry anything about the friend’s detail. When go to secondary we start to enjoy an element call friendship. We write friendship poem recognizing the ship. In teenager stage we like to share the both happy and sad moments completely to our so-called best friend. Which then later you realize may not a good idea. Because some remain your friend but the closeness could have fade-off; some may no more in touch but somewhere out there carrying some of your secrets with them. Some may still near you but at the opposite site of the road as enemies. Well yeah it happens.

Only when you step into your 21st you understand the real value behind of the ship. And start choosing them with little careful and determine the level to open your stories as well. Not to deny, that’s the most enjoyable term of being in warmness of friendship. You appreciate the relationship and pay importance for bonding. The friendship continues from here but the active period depends on the individuals and the intensity of the ship itself.

Look at the age, in beginning at our early 20s a group of friends talk about studies and soon later about their career development. That’s the time all busy working and making our account as fat as you can too. Yet they still keep in touch closely. Soon the topics changes to another level of life, love life. Friends enjoy sharing the up and downs of being in love. Besides, chit-chatting is like sugar-eating and days past with lotta fun at this stage. The things you talk about similar at the point of life. Later few of them may just started seeing someone, few may already met their life partner, or some may even busy finalizing for their weddings. Then slowly one by one will get going with their life and busy with babies, husband, and family and work too.

Suddenly one day you realize, you are left alone in the plane of single. Either you hardly receive calls from married-friends or even having them around but while they lost in stories of kids and husband, you sitting quietly having your old career-related story on mind which not attractive anymore.

You, as someone whom too sure to live single and proudly publicize it to all you friends when they advise you tie a knot, start feeling the back-draws of being single. The quietness of life is often felt. The loneness starts to stay with you longer. You hardly have friends whom have time to spare, to go out with you for a cup of coffee, to hanging in phone or even to sms. All this over and over again push you to rewind the mental video to those beautiful moments of close-friends days. Which now, obviously you do not own one.

It’s not their fault and nobody’s either. This is the natural circle and choice to be a sore thumb is your call anyway. No doubt being friends for so long but suddenly you feel like you are not enjoying the chain of companionship anymore. It doesn’t mean you have to regret for not getting married but maybe its time to change or join another club. Single-forever club. J That will take in that it’s not about being single but it’s about where you feeling good right now at you life journey.

For those noding head right now, no worries girl.. Understand and accept the changes and wish you find a clicking group soon. :-)

The most 10 things I do before die..

1.Update my ‘will’ doc in my laptop.
2.Have fun at a world class roller coaster ride.
3.Get a BMW M3 convertible - have a midnight high-speed ride with my favorite songs
4.Bring my mum for a wonderful vacation.
5.Make effort to write a ‘hi n bye’ letters to all my friends.
6.Have private dinner with each of my loved ones.
7.Play with my niece and nephew at their favorite theme park till we drop.
8.Write all my life secrets in a ‘secret’ blog.
9.Drink all the night without feeling guilty.
10.‘clean’ my bedroom.